Life’s possibilities

It’s funny how life finds you in a spot where you never really expected it to be and yet it’s oddly comfortable. I am oddly baffled by a dream that I had when I was about 10 and I had it for years and years and years I had this dream and then it stops and my life took a lot of different pass with a few different relationships and the men in my life that never really seem to fit into my life and it always felt like there was something missing. You know they say that love is a emotion that your body reacts to some say the butterflies and nervousness and the euphoria that you feel is love and I think that is just not love but it is in fact just a attractionand lust. A primal feeling of lust that is just something that you really desire yet there’s nothing holding you together just a feeling of sex and maybe a little bit of desire but nothing that really sticks to you to that person. If you notice in my blog I talk a lot about love I believe in luck I believe in passion and being with that one person that makes you feel like nothing you’ve ever felt before. I’ve never given up on love I believe it’s out there I believe that love is there waiting for you to find your perfect match that one being that completes you in a way that you’ve never expected. Love comes in somany forms, You can love people by caring about them by wanting to take care of them help them show them comfort them educate them and encouraging them but that is a one-way street so how do we get from just loving people to be being in love? Do I have the answer? Probably not yet! Do I want to know absolutely I love openly I love people there’s no harm in loving people there’s no harm in loving the idea of being with somebody or loving the idea of holding hands or making memories or doing things but really in the end of all of that is that really what love is I don’t think so. To me love is something that is so much deeper something that two people share that is so unique to just them to me love is home and family protecting what is yours and standing up to the world and saying hey you know what back off because I am here to stand up and say that this is mine and I am here and I am staying and I am fighting because I believe that what mine is worth fighting for. I have somebody who makes me think aboutThe possible that I’m reachable space and it frightens me and it makes me think really is this really real is this possible is it obtainable my mind is wandering so far out there and so lost inside of it so that I don’t know if anything I am saying is even making sense even to myself as I talk about it. For the first time I don’t want to jump with both feet I am not jumping blindly I’m not thinking of that does that usually pop into my mind strange strange strange strange for me to even right about this. I have so much to think about and so much that I want to say and so much that I don’t want to say that it is actually one of the more impossible feat for me to re-writing this because I don’t know where I am and it is a confusion that is even confusing mey